


The silence of wolves

by byzinha



Series: Stalia love affair [13]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-04-05 11:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 5,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4178040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byzinha/pseuds/byzinha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The clock ticked words of a fear that was the key to their nightmares, a call to the creatures of the night in a silent howl of dread and terror and death tick tick tick </p><p>the sequel to The Moon Howls that I promised months ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A little more than an year ago I published here a fic called " _The Moon Howls_ ", filling gaps of our fourth season of Teen Wolf. By the end of the season - and the fic - I told you all that I would be back.
> 
> Well, **I'M BACK, BITCHES**!
> 
> We have a little more than a week until season 5a finally arrives (oh, how did I miss me Teen Wolf babies), this season seems to be extremely dark (hello again my 3b golden days! I'm so glad you're back!) and of course I couldn't miss my cue.
> 
> Now, I liked this first chapter so much, only based on the previews we've been seeing and the little information that we got that I had to post it separately in my personal blog, no translation and anything, in the format of poetry, because I'm feeling poetic today. I guess it comes from reading too much Catherynne Valente. You can find the link to my blog on my profile page. ANYWAY.
> 
>  **Teen Wolf and its poor, poor characters are not mine**. I'd have a whole lot of happiness for them if they were.
> 
> I also need to remind you that english is not my first language and I probably suck, but give me a chance? Pretty please? Thank you very much!

" _I shall be telling this with a sigh_  
 _Somewhere ages and ages hence:_  
 _Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—_  
 _I took the one less traveled by,_  
 _And that has made all the difference_."  
Robert Frost

* * *

**ONE**

There was a clock ticking in the back of their minds counting down every day, scratching the rare moments of happiness that dared to last one minute more and another minute more and another minute more yet tick tick tick

That clock whispered words of fear, of confident terror lurking on their backs, waiting for its finest moment to come out, a curse of rough path that called the creatures of the night in a silent howl of dread and panic and pain and death yet tick tick tick

And that fear was the key to their trembling legs, failed memories, missed calls, foggy eyes, the very core of their nightmares, the shadow of their existence and surviving and strive tick tick tick

tack


	2. TWO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I'm sorry it took so long to update, but last week I was in Rio to see Paper Towns and John Green! (and Nat Wolf too!) I wrote all about it on my blog (whosthanny dot com), but it's in portuguese. We have the audio and a few videos too there, all in english, if you want to see it. To sum it up: IT WAS AWESOME! Go watch Paper Towns! It's better than TFiOS and I don't even like the book!
> 
> BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
> 
> I've a question for yall: Do you want me to write this fic exactly like The Moon Howls, only focused on Stiles and Malia, or would you like to see more of the other characters point of view? I'm loving this season, everyone in it (except the new guy. the new guy can go suck balls) and I wouldn't mind writing about Lydia and Kira and Liam, but it's your call.
> 
> Thank you so much for believing in me again! I hope I can see yall reviews and opinions each chapter. The plan is at least two chapters per episode, so I better hurry, right? And now enough talking!

The thing about those months of calmness was that they comforted everyone. They didn't have enough time last time to truly grieve, mourn, adapt, and now a whole semester had passed - no tricksters, no berserkers, no crazy fathers, lousy fathers, busy fathers.

In fact, Malia had the chance to bond with Mr. Tate, time to ponder her family choices, spend less time at Stiles' and more with Derek. Lydia was helping Parrish and they weren't progressing, but they could tell that something was happening.

And even though Malia wasn't going as well as she wanted in school and even though there was a big chance of Kira having to go back to New York eventually, and even though Stiles had an amazing talent of getting more nervous when things were good, nervous about normal things in a higher scale than he did with supernatural things and even though Liam (their baby werewolf Liam) still was struggling. Even though they still didn't know what Parrish was and Lydia was slowly gaining control over her powers; even though Scott was figuring out what he wanted to do with his life not knowing if he'd have the brains for it...

...those months of calmness comforted them. And to be used with comfort was tricky, but welcomed. Calmness and comfort was something that pack couldn't say no to.


	3. THREE

But of course things where too calm to be good, right?

On the night of the Senior Scribe, it was like hell went down. It was full moon, and it was a pleasure for  Malia  to know that the moon didn't tame her anymore. If she dared to say, those nights were her favorites again ,  like she had the two things she liked the most right at hands range: Stiles and the mom.

It was all a big plan that she liked to be part of, but of course nothing is so simple and as soon as Liam arrived she knew that shit would go do.

And it did, damn well it did. The attack Scott suffered was just a little reminder that is not easy to be supernatural in Beacon Hills.


	4. FOUR

The idea of Malia finally learning how to drive came, surprising many, from Stiles, when they were on a road trip, coming back from a weekend in San Francisco after Malia's last week of Summer school. The Jeep was a succumbing thing that the werecoyote knew he wouldn't trust to anyone, but even so he threw the question when they were on an diner like this

"Hey, Mal, don't you want to learn how to drive?"

They were with Scott and Liam and the three werecreatures looked at Stiles rather surprised.

"What?" She said astonished.

"Drive. You never brought it up, so I was wondering."

"Now, you were wondering now?" Malia insisted and Scott and Liam exchanged a look. Stiles nodded then shrugged.

"Yeah. You know how my mind works. So, do you want to?"

Malia thought for a bit, frowning, her food forgotten for a few moments.

"Yeah, I guess." Because, really, what did she have to lose? And then she thought better. "But I don't want you to teach me."

Stiles let his hamburger fall surprised.

"Excuse me?"

"Maybe Lydia can teach me." She continued and under the unbelieved look of her boyfriend, she had to add. "No way you can teach me, you've too much nerves, it'd never work."

"But..." Stiles looked at Scott for some reassuring, but found none and then looked at Malia again, her face so matter-of-factly that there was no way he could argue. "Yeah, I think Lydia could teach you. Maybe you should ring her latter."

Malia smiled. There was something about cars that still edged her, but times were changing, right? So maybe se could do that. Maybe she could pull it off. And if Stiles thought it was time already, she believed him. She'd always believe him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, for the kudos and I hope you also leave a comment! :D


	5. FIVE

"Are you going to tell me how was it?" Stiles asked in their first week back, after she had two driving classes with Mr. Yukimura along with the sophomores. She was the older student there, but that shouldn't surprise anyone, after all, Malia was the feral child of Beacon Hills.

"Alright, I guess." She deflected. It became a thing the past couple of days: If Stiles wasn't talking about Theo, he was talking about her and she had a good guess to why.

"Really? Because Liam-"

"Since when" she cut him, already feeling the mock rise inside her. Man, they spent too much time together. "do you even care about what Liam says?"

It was the ultimate provocation and Stiles crisped his eyes, not quite biting it, even though she could tell that he wanted to. Well, if he was going to play hard, so would she, so she continued.

"I mean, I know that you and Scott take this co-parenting very seriously, but this is going too far if you actually are listening to your child."

"Stop."

"Seriously, Sti. If you keep it up, then fast enough you'll be giving him partner advice and-"

"For real, shut the hell up about it already." He snapped, but he could never be too serious with her, not when they were at home after they watched half a season of United States of Tara. "I'm not co-parenting anyone! I'm just asking you how was your day and the drive lessons that the rabid cub mentioned was rather disastrous. I want your version."

Malia stopped then and smiled. Their pack was diverse, a little bit of a mess, but they were so alike in so many ways. She was once called rabid too. Damn, she'd take the word 'rabid' rather than 'human' in a heartbeat still. She shared the practicability with her mate Stiles; they got along so easily because they could understand each other in deeper levels than she couldn't even understand herself. The loyalty Scott demonstrated was out of this world and also the only thing she could understand both as the human and the coyote.

When it came to Lydia, no one could say that they were too far from the other. Perhaps, the banshee had less things in common with her than any member of the pack, but there was a line there that made them intrinsically connected, some might even call it friendship. And, of course, Kira was the second easiest person she bonded with, even after their rough start.

Their were so unique, that little pack of hers. Her family of choice.

She wondered if Theo would have space in there too and the answer was unknown.

So yeah, Malia did have a lot to say about her day and the driving lessons, about how she was warming up to cars, but could never really feel healed about it and how damaging it was. Damn, if she said that, maybe Stiles would even come up with something, some sort of solution about how to handle her anxiety and trauma. But she didn't know how, she couldn't seem to be able to put the words together about her troubles, so she didn't. She just smiled warmly, leaned her head on his shoulder, they both facing the crime board, and said the safest thing she could say.

"There's room for improvements." Which was also true.


	6. SIX

The t hing about trust, Stiles knew, was that even though you know the other person is keeping something from you, you let it be. At least he owed that to  Malia  for what had happened the previous year. He knew there was something going on, she was never a big fan of car rides, but if she wasn't ready to talk about it, he wouldn't force it. He knew damn well how it was to have something big in your mind and heart and not to be able to talk it out.  Malia  should have her time.

Besides, he was struggling with his own troubles. Donovan was a piece of shit, it was true, and there was no way he'd be out of jail anytime soon, but could his father have some peace already? And Tracy... damn, Tracy had been terroriz ing  the city and they didn't even know what she was, not until the very last minute, when she put everyone in a  mo tionless  spree.

Sometimes, Stiles thought that he'd have a stroke before everyone else, but that wasn't any news, really. He had always been the anxious, overthinking one, even when his mom still was around.

He couldn't shake the feeling that there was something about  Malia , though, that could go loose. The feeling that it didn't matter how long she stayed human, that coyote part of her was irreplaceable, that she'd always go back to that primal instinct of the rules of the wild kingdom. And even though they agreed most of the time, that could be the one point that would break them.


	7. SEVEN

Stiles once (maybe more than once) told her that rules of the wild kingdom didn't apply to friends and  by  now she could  already understood  that. 

(sort of)

What she couldn't quite pick up was why it couldn't apply to enemies too. Tracy , from all they knew,  was around killing people and in the woods, if you know you can take down a threat, you do it .  Damn, she had put everyone into paralyzes for a very long time and to be honest Malia  didn't like to be paralyzed.

Her first thought always was to hit and hurt, go for the kill. Part of her knew that it would always be her first instinct. And hell, she wanted to hurt Tracy for all the bad that she's done, all the hurt that she'd caused. Lydia was bleeding upstairs, for Christ's sake! M aybe that 's  what her mother  would do : She d idn' t  think twice about taking threats ,  d idn ' t  bother with consequences , she just d id  it. It  was  pure instinct and coyotes are known for being good at it .

E xcept that Tracy  wa s no threat at all ,  Malia  realiz ed just in time . S he  was  just a confused girl living with a fear that was destroying her so deeply that it was sad.  And if there was one thing  Malia  knew , it was to have fear inside her. It surfaced in  h er  skin every day in larger or smaller scale s  every single day for the past nine years  and it wasn't pretty.

So, instead,  she helped Tracy.  Because  Malia  was human too. It was half of her, or even forty percent of her, if she dared, but it was her - the human, the girl, the person who understood. To help was all she could do, not with claws and teeth, but with words and care. It was the tiniest thing she could ever do, and if it didn't help her right some of her wrongs, at least it be some new right of her own bright, new, human, Tate life.  Not the ghost of Peter Hale and the Desert Wolf, but  Malia  Tate. Her choice to be herself and herself alone.


	8. EIGHT

Among all the rollercoaster of emotions that collided in Stiles ever since Tracy woke up, the most overwhelming one was the guttural, almost desperate need Malia has to assure him and Scott that she didn’t kill Tracy, she didn’t do it despite all the times she said she would, that they should.

“They had masks.” She told them, so confused and scared that it almost didn’t make sense.

There was more to the story, he knew, but Lydia was hurt upstairs, Tracy wasn’t changing back and Malia was panicking, and if _Malia_ was panicking, then things must be very ugly.

“Stiles, I didn’t do this.” She said again and her words alone were enough for him to hold her shoulders and agree.

They still had a lot to figure out – what was different about Tracy and dig deeper to figure out what Malia meant with those masked assassins that killed the girl they were so close to saving – and the night was still very young.


	9. NINE

“This would be so much easier to explain if we were all coyotes.” Malia complained as they dug through books in Derek’s apartment about supernatural history.

Although her cousin was out of town since the beginning of summer, he gave her the pass code for when she wanted some time alone (NOT – he made sure – with Stiles tagging along as a date) and she had read a few of those titles he had in his office. The Hale library was lost in the fire and Derek had to rebuild it from the scratch. He travelled the country and the world looking for copies of the books he had grown up with and more. For all she knew, he could be doing that right now.

“How come?” Stiles asked distractedly, flipping the pages of a Bestiary. She waited for him to look up at her and shrugged.

“Coyotes communicate by images.” Malia explained and he opened his mouth in an _oh_ , making no sound. “It’d be much easier to show you how those guys were. I can’t draw shit and I can’t even begin to be able to describe them.”

She closed the book she was holding with more strength than necessary, lifting a cloud of dust between them, that book was old, but useless, and she threw it on the table.

“Hey…” Stiles called, resting one hand on her upper arm the way he did whenever he wanted her to calm down because he was there, even though he constantly reeked of anxiety. “Don’t worry, we will figure out, I promise.”

“I think we are missing something, though.” She wondered and grabbed half of the pile of books they decided to immerse into at school. “I can’t quite place what yet.”

Stiles scoffed, as if it wasn’t news. Well, it probably wasn’t.

“You and I both, Mal. You and I both.”

They each cared their share of books out of the loft (that was carefully locked again. Derek was seriously done with all those teenagers breaking in whenever they wanted) and back to the Jeep, ready to meet everyone at the school for some fun reading.

“You know I’m not talking about Theo, right?” Malia commented getting in the car and Stiles side-eyed her, so she was quick to add “Although I do think you’re right about him.” Not because it was what he wanted to hear, but because she truly believed it and he sighed relieved.

“Thanks.”

“I’m just not sure what to do about him.”

“My dad said that all we have to do is wait. He _will_ screw up eventually, we just have to be careful and be watching.” He said, his mind focused, his eyes on the road and she nodded agreeing. “Look, Mal, we need to stick together, you and I. because we understand each other and we have synchronism. We will know what to do.”

“The others won’t?” the werecoyote asked, frowning and Stiles shook his head.

“Not the way _we_ do. We have our own code.”

“Right.” She smiled. “Because we’re mates.”

Incapable of hiding, he smiled too, already feeling lighter.

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s right. We don’t need to handle Theo the same way Scott does. We can have our own rules.”

“As long as we don’t torture him.” Malia stated, remembering all the times that suggestion was discarded by every single member of the pack except Stiles and Liam. “Nor kill him.”

“Hm.” Stiles thought out loud. They already could see the school getting closer. “I wouldn’t cut that from the list so fast.” He said, then quickly looked at her. “Don’t tell Scott I said that.”

Malia laughed. His secret was safe with her.


	10. TEN

After Malia found the book, sent a pic of the cover to the whole pack telling that “ _these are the guys!!_ ”, she was so mesmerized by it that she sat on Tracy’s bed dialing Stiles’ number a few times before getting deep into the story and when she realized it, it already was late and she was starting chapter five, so she took the bus downtown, ordered a pizza with her nose still on the book and was paying when her phone buzzed.

_Are you coming home tonight?_ – Stiles

 _On my way_. – Malia

From downtown to the Stilinski home was a fast ride and once the bus passed she got there in ten minutes (she could walk, but she really wanted to read that book and figure out what those guys – Doctors? – were) and found the Sheriff in the kitchen with his head in the fridge.

“Diner?” the girl offered and he stopped everything he was doing to peek inside the mega box she brought.

“Yes, please. The refrigerator is so empty is depressing.” He said sitting down and fixed himself a slice.

Malia frowned, making a mental note to help fill the fridge and then found a paper plate where she separated two slices of pizza.

“Where’s Stiles?”

“His room. This case is taking every minute of our time to get solved.”

“And I might have found a clue.” She said, dumping the book on tome of the pizza box. “These are the guys I saw killing Tracy, I found the book in her room.” She continued as the sheriff picked up the book and analyzed the cover. She took a bite of her slice and then pilled the plate with two more just in case.

“Science fiction, Malia, for real?” the sheriff asked, frowning.

They chatted and theorized for some time and then Malia went up to check on Stiles, leaving his father with the book. She could smell the anxiety and curiosity emanating from him and that was a new combination somehow.

Stiles was sitting on his bed going through his journal filled with notes, but when Malia stepped inside and put the plate on the table, he looked up and faster than one would’ve though got up and embraced her, hiding his face on the curve of her neck.

“Are you alright?” he asked, although she was the one who wanted to make that question. Instead, she held him back, one arm tightly around him, the other hand going through his hair slowly and caring. Stiles didn’t look up, just stayed that way as if that was all he could do to keep it together and yes, she could smell the blood and the confusion, but they were battling there and God knew how many chances she’d have to hold him like that again.

So she let him.

“I’m alright.” Malia answered, her voice so calm no one could tell she was reading a horror book just minutes before. “I found the book-“

“Shhh.” He cut her and for longer than expected they were silent before he spoke again. “I saw it, but we can talk about it later.”

Only then Stiles looked up, his embrace loosening a bit. There was something in his eyes, something like a secret, but she knew he’d tell her – she was sure he would. He just needed to get over it first, to be able to put it into words, like her PSTD while driving. It was part of the deal.

He was tired and restless and he needed her. Same way she needed him. And they had each other.

“You brought pizza?” he suddenly asked and Malia smiled.

“Peperoni, we deserve it.”

And even though he didn’t eat as much as one slice as she devoured the other two, and even though he only slept when he was in her arms as she tried to read, and even though she wasn’t exactly comfortable and couldn’t put the book down until she was finished…

It was a good night. It really was.


	11. ELEVEN

The aura of tension among the pack was so dense it was almost palpable, each one caring a burden they knew would ease if they shared, but all too scared to open their mouths.

Perhaps, they all thought in their own seats, there had never been a scarier time in their lives than right now. No Benefactor, no nogitsune, no nothing that happened before could compare.

 

That book, it seemed, had a tendency of bringing back some demons. For Malia, a memory that could change everything she thought she knew about herself, a truth so hidden that her brain chose to replace it with a lie that’d haunt her, as a way for her to never find out what really happened.

For Stiles, it was different. It was brutal. His hidden truth was something that he tried so much to keep that way, although somehow it always surfaced to haunt him, not that clearly, not so step by step. But it was there, it had always been there.

Why would that book want him to remember exactly _that_? How was that a hint to what the Doctors were doing? Was it just a mind trick to get him to the roof, where he found the other chimera?

Wasn’t it just mean?


	12. TWELVE

“Do the kids know that it’s a trap?” Malia asked when Stiles explained the plan and her boyfriend shrugged.

“I don’t know.”

“What do you think?” she pressed and he thought for a couple of seconds.

“It’s the mighty Alpha Scott, so I’m pretty sure they know.” he answered truly believing it and she nodded.

“It’s good they know, you gotta be honest with your children.”

At that, Stiles rolled his eyes.

“Not the parenting thing again.” He almost begged and Malia chuckled.

“You do know that it won’t never, ever get old, right?” she teased even more, but he had no space to even begin to get mad at her, because she slid closer to him on the jeep seat and laid her head on his shoulder, all cuddles and he relaxed.

“Are you going to be fine without me tonight?” Stiles asked, lacing his fingers with hers.

“I don’t know, are _you_ gonna be fine without me tonight?” she retorted and he smiled.

“I’ve this theory that Theo will try to kiss my ass for as long as he can take before he breaks. And he won’t break tonight, it’s too soon.”

Malia nodded with her head still on his shoulder.

“Just… howl if you need anything, okay?” she said and Stiles frowned.

“You mean ‘call’?” he asked and she sat straight, looked at him with serious eyes.

“Calling takes too long. Howling is quicker.”

They were silent for a few, just looking at each other, him waiting for her to say that she was kidding and slowly realizing she wasn’t.

“Mal, I can’t how.”

She didn’t seem the least bit shaken with his words. Instead, she just said

“You will figure it out.”

And it was kind of settled.


	13. THIRTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I admit, it was a slow year for me, 2015. I guess it was bad for a lot of people. It most certainly was bad for Stalia D; But hey! Teen Wolf comes back today, and there are a lot of things to happen. Of course, I don't think I'll mind some Stalia angst. I think I'm used to it already, as long as there's a happy ending at the end. (can't blame be for being optimist, can you?)
> 
> So I couldn't let this pass. Plus, I didn't write anything for 5x11 like I should have. I was confiting this one, you know how writers are full of tricks (we totally aren't).
> 
> Anyway! Nobody reads author's notes, I'm just shouting in the void to have it attested somewhere that I'll continue this fic along with the rest of season 5. You can bet there will be more! Meanwhile, may the chapter be with you!
> 
> (and please, review at the end? cheers!)

He didn’t howl like he should have and that was why there was no Malia to the rescue that night. But how could he even want saving if he was beyond it already? How could it be okay to be saved?

For certain, Scott would find out some sort of motivational speech to justify mistakes and give reasons to salvation – but that just until he finds out what Stiles did.

If Scott ever knew, Stiles was certain, they’d be ruined. Forever broken with no possibility of repair. The cracks were already there, with his father asking questions and Parrish’s tag found on the floor, with being busted by his library card.

“Theo saved the puppies today.” Malia said standing in front of him when she met him at the hospital, Stiles still with his head down, the keycard thrown away. The way she put the words implied his biggest fear, that somehow Theo was getting into her.

It was a hell of a night, for sure.

“Sti,” she called, almost making him look up. She reached for his shoulder and he shivered, but didn’t lean away from her touch. Just the warmth coming from her already relaxed him and slowly he processed that she was there. “Let’s go home.” His Malia was there to rescue him.


	14. FOURTEEN

The world had a way of crashing down and dragging whoever was on the way along that was so frustrating it was freezing. Years ago, Malia Tate knew a truth that wasn’t true, although it was real. It had been brought down and rebuilt way too many times, not always nicely, but every single time effectively. Now, she knew a reality that wasn’t real although it was true.

And it was thousands of times worst.


	15. FIFTEEN

“ _If being afraid is a crime we hang side by side at the swingin’ party down the line_.”  
_Swingin Party_ – The Replacements

Her den.

She’d always come back to it, apparently. The place where the car crashed, where her mother and sister died. Was she trying to eat them? Was she trying to rescue them? How far her coyote mind could reach into her humanity? Far enough to grief and weep and carry this burden every single day.

Stiles had come to her den as well, when he himself was lost. Why did he come? For a long time, she believed that they were connected by something different. Mates, she felt. Deep down in her chest. Mates. Was there something more powerful than that?

She doubted so, because she overcame his secrets and his insecurities, she held him and he held her and he was there for her all the time and she was there for him all the time, even when they didn’t want to have company, even when they fought. That was what made them _them_.

It didn’t feel like it was enough, though.

“It didn’t matter to me.” She had told him.

“Yeah, but it matters to me.” He replied. Because there’s always something else when it comes to Stiles, like she can’t help but be a step behind. When it was about him, she felt so powerless for not being able to tune down his pain, so frustrated for he didn’t let her close enough.

What happened to them?

With one last look to her den, Malia still couldn’t figure out an answer. Maybe time would tell, the way it was telling her about her origin.

Maybe.


	16. SIXTEEN

“ _That’s the last prayer to save your heart.  
The heart isn’t as simple as you think,   
it can fit what doesn’t fit in the exemption.  
It fits my love, fits three whole lives,  
fits a dressing table, it fits us two_.”  
_Oração_ – A Banda Mais Bonita da Cidade

 

It happened once after they found her – they never showed up again and she guessed that she would never see them again.

Then, it happened twice, when she woke up in the basement of Eichen and found Stiles leaving her behind.

The third time was her turn to leave, because everything, all the family drama, was pilling up and she needed time.

She guessed he needed time as well, this time, although she wasn’t sure what bothered Stiles so much. Of course none of them was very familiar with murdering, but he was defending himself, shouldn’t it count? Like that time when she killed a cougar, even though the animal always fascinated her, because it was a life and death situation. You just had to find your peace with it.

That third time… he let her be. And the more she wanted to help him, be with him, perhaps she should give him the time and space he so wanted. She had her own thing to do as well.

Perhaps it was for the best.


	17. SEVENTEEN

He scrolled through his contacts again, even though Malia’s number was on speed dial. If he called her, would she answer? After everything he said – which wasn’t much, but was enough – he wasn’t so sure. She sure didn’t try to contact him.

And of course he didn’t know that she had watched the Sheriff’s progress from the distance, through glassed doors and supernatural hearing. And he didn’t know what she was up to, even though his gut was telling him that he should try harder to get closer to her.

The problem was that he couldn’t understand why she forgave him so easily for doing something he couldn’t forgive himself. He couldn’t understand how this was okay, when every synapse of his body told him that it wasn’t and that he was doomed and that he didn’t deserve anything, anyone around him.

Forgiveness was a privilege he couldn’t afford. (and quite frankly: one he didn’t want to get)


	18. EIGHTEEN

Malia had a problem. It came in the format of a werecoyote chimera that insisted on looking so good outside, but was so ugly inside. His bullshiting was extremely annoying and she couldn't completely trust him (like _ever_ ), but she had to put just a little trust, if she was to achieve what she wanted. If Stiles was with her, he'd be the first person to jump into her mad road, with at least four detailed plans to go with in case something went wrong. Together, they'd find results twice as fast, now that she knew so much. But Stiles wasn't with her, he still wasn't even talking to her. The chimera was her best shot.

Stiles had a problem. It came as a catatonic banshee that happened to be one of his best friends, one of the people he truly loved. Her medical state was extremely worrisome, because there was no way they could live so long without her help and skills. She was the compass of the pack and without her, they all fell apart. If Malia was with her, she'd be the first person to jump into any of his plans to help their friend, with some smart or funny remark to make to lighten the mood. They acted in sync, Malia and he, because she was smart and a fast thinker. But Malia wasn't with him, she still wasn't even talking to him (he knew it was mostly his fault). To wait was his only action.


End file.
